Thursday, 1 March 2012

Opening fists

How does one go about "letting go" of something that's lodged in one's mind? I've often quizzed God about this one.

It's not as if I can physically drop this out of my hands at Your feet although that would be the most wonderful freedom. I need to let go of it mentally and I want to open my brain fists which are currently squeezing the life out of it. Let my hands go soft and give this to You, hoping that You will do something with it. The thought of letting it go and it falling to the wayside overlooked and ignored is part of what makes my hands clench tighter. What if I let go and that action means it is lost forever? I think I can keep it and try to protect it and nurture it and encourage it in this way and that and perhaps it will grow into something beautiful. Probably not, I've killed so many plants. It really is always better in Your hands.

And perhaps this thing I grasp at is not what You want for me, not intended for me or healthy for me and You'd rather I let go and go on without. I want to trust You and I cling to the hope that that seed of faith will be enough for You to work with. You are forever faithful and although I can't package this thing up and ship it out, I'll choose in a thousand daily ways to offer it to You. Thank You for wanting to take it, my hands are exhausted.

1 comment:

  1. gosh I can relate to this. exactly what i'm going through right now. Thanks for this too